Forums > Personal > Just another silly joke

forum rss feed
Author

John S Stuart user not visiting Queenzone.com
John S Stuart
Deity: 4178 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 10 Nov 07, 06:46 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

A very old and decrepit Italian man walks into his local church and tells his priest he only has a few weeks to live.
He also says that he would like to make his peace with god and confess all his sins.

So he tells the priest that when he was a young man, he helped to shelter a beautiful young Italian Jew from the Nazi's during the war.
But that in return he demanded sexual favours from her.

How do I make amends he confesses?

"Well" says the priest. "You did save her from a horrible death, so I think God will understand".
So I think 10 "Hail Mary's" should be fine.

"No, No", says the old Italian. "You don't understand".

"How do I tell her her the war is over?"


"Listen to them. Children of the night. What music they make."
Raf user not visiting Queenzone.com
Stop this noise!
Raf
Deity: 8274 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 10 Nov 07, 07:03 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

ROFL!


We got the Cosmos rockin'!

We got the Cosmos rockin'!

We got the Universe rockin'!

We got the Cosmos rockin'!

We got the Cosmos rockin' to the mighty power of rock'n'roll!
Ms. Rebel user not visiting Queenzone.com
Ms. Rebel
Deity: 3428 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 10 Nov 07, 08:12 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH THAT WAS A GOOOOOOOD ONE...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA....WAAAAAAAA...WOOOOO!!!
Okay, now I'm going to read it.

Edit*
nice :)

PS. my priest is a pedophile.


I'm sick of all my kicks.
its_a_hard_life 26994 user not visiting Queenzone.com

Deity: 11046 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 10 Nov 07, 08:37 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

¬.¬'

bobo the chimp user not visiting Queenzone.com
bobo the chimp
Deity: 12700 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 10 Nov 07, 08:38 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Is it wrong that I've taken this joke onboard as a possible pick-up strategy?


"Your not funny, your not a good musician, theres a difference between being funny and being an idiot, you obviously being the latter" - Dave R Fuller
bobo the chimp user not visiting Queenzone.com
bobo the chimp
Deity: 12700 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 10 Nov 07, 08:38 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Is it wrong that I've taken this joke onboard as a possible pick-up strategy?


"Your not funny, your not a good musician, theres a difference between being funny and being an idiot, you obviously being the latter" - Dave R Fuller
Sergei. user not visiting Queenzone.com
Impresario, still
Sergei.
Deity: 4682 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 10 Nov 07, 08:43 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Ehhhh.

I like the one about the coffin better. ;P


Back whenever
YourValentine user not visiting Queenzone.com
registered July 27th 2001
YourValentine
Deity: 7611 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 10 Nov 07, 10:19 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Are you saying the war is over???

Some jokes from the hub joke bot:

Two blondes are on a plane to California, they are about two hours into the flight when the pilot gets on the intercom and says "we just lost an engine but it is all right we have three more but it will take us an hour longer". Half an hour later he gets on the intercom again and says "we just lost another engine but its all right we have two more it will take us another half hour though". One of the blondes says ''If we lose the two last engines we will be up here all day''


In a second grade class, a little girl asks, ''Teacher, can my Mommy get pregnant?'', ''How old is your mother, dear?'' asks the teacher. ''Forty.'' she replies. ''Yes, dear, your mother could get pregnant.'' The little girl then asks, ''Can my big sister get pregnant?'' ''Well, dear, how old is your sister?'' The little girl answers, ''Nineteen.'' ''Oh yes, dear, your sister certainly could get pregnant.'' The little girl then asks, ''Can I get pregnant?'' ''How old are you, dear?'' The little girl answers, ''I'm seven years old.'' ''No, dear, you can't get pregnant...'' Then, the little boy behind the little girl gives her a poke and says, ''See, I told you we had nothing to worry about.''




I do not want any google ads here.

Erin user not visiting Queenzone.com
Erin
Deity: 8445 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 10 Nov 07, 11:32 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Su Wong marries Lee Wong. The next year, the Wongs have a new baby. The nurse brings them over a lovely, healthy, bouncy, definitely Caucasian white baby boy!

"Congratulations," says the nurse to the new parents. "What will you name the baby"?
The puzzled father looks at his new baby boy and says, "Well, two Wong's don't make a white, so I think we will name him Sum Ting Wong!


Ms. Rebel user not visiting Queenzone.com
Ms. Rebel
Deity: 3428 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 10 Nov 07, 13:14 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Total retard is driving a truck, and he picks up nun that needs a ride. He says:"I will give you a lift, if you will have a sex with me" Nun answers:"Alright, but I won't do it if you are married"
Retard says:"No, I'm not married, i'm single."
Nun asks:"Do you have a condom?"
Reatrd answers:"No, we'll do it from behind, is that okay with you?"
Nun says:"Yes, it is, let's do it"

After hard sex, retard says:"I must confess you something, I'm married and have 2 kids."
Nun says:"I also have confession to make."
She tooks off her veil and says:"I'm Billy and I'm going trick or threating!"


Wahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!! Oooooooooh...mine is the funniest one...Hahahahahaha....
x'D


I'm sick of all my kicks.
John S Stuart user not visiting Queenzone.com
John S Stuart
Deity: 4178 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 10 Nov 07, 14:49 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Mother is vacuuming under her young son's bed, when she finds a stash of hardcore S&M magazines.

So when father comes home from work - she asks "What will we do with him"?

"God knows!" replies father, but whatever it is - we better not spank him".


"Listen to them. Children of the night. What music they make."
.DeaconJohn. user not visiting Queenzone.com

Bohemian: 437 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 10 Nov 07, 15:23 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

John S Stuart wrote:

Mother is vacuuming under her young son's bed, when she finds a stash of hardcore S&M magazines.

So when father comes home from work - she asks "What will we do with him"?

"God knows!" replies father, but whatever it is - we better not spank him".



Hahaha. Like it.

Stoner user not visiting Queenzone.com

Bohemian: 256 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 15 Nov 07, 15:41 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

YourValentine wrote:

Are you saying the war is over???

Some jokes from the hub joke bot:

Two blondes are on a plane to California, they are about two hours into the flight when the pilot gets on the intercom and says "we just lost an engine but it is all right we have three more but it will take us an hour longer". Half an hour later he gets on the intercom again and says "we just lost another engine but its all right we have two more it will take us another half hour though". One of the blondes says ''If we lose the two last engines we will be up here all day''



I DON'T GET IT.

Stoner user not visiting Queenzone.com

Bohemian: 256 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 15 Nov 07, 15:43 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

<font color=0000CC>Mab Meddows Mercury wrote:

In a murder trial, the defense attorney was cross-examining the coroner:

Attorney: Before you signed the death certificate, had you taken the pulse?

Coroner: No.

Attorney: Did you listen to the heart?

Coroner: No.

Attorney: Did you check for breathing?

Coroner: No.

Attorney: So, when you signed the death certificate, you weren't sure the man was dead, were you?

Coroner: Well, let me put it this way. The man's brain was sitting in a jar on my desk. But I guess it's possible he could be out there practicing law somewhere.


THIS ONE WAS MY FAVORITE!! MY VERY FAVORITE!

Nathan user not visiting Queenzone.com

Deity: 2305 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 15 Nov 07, 17:35 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

A nuclear scientist decided it was time to change careers and became a film director. Unfortunately, all his films bombed at the box office.

Queenluv4Life user not visiting Queenzone.com

Bohemian: 216 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 15 Nov 07, 20:46 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

YourValentine wrote:

Are you saying the war is over???

Some jokes from the hub joke bot:

In a second grade class, a little girl asks, ''Teacher, can my Mommy get pregnant?'', ''How old is your mother, dear?'' asks the teacher. ''Forty.'' she replies. ''Yes, dear, your mother could get pregnant.'' The little girl then asks, ''Can my big sister get pregnant?'' ''Well, dear, how old is your sister?'' The little girl answers, ''Nineteen.'' ''Oh yes, dear, your sister certainly could get pregnant.'' The little girl then asks, ''Can I get pregnant?'' ''How old are you, dear?'' The little girl answers, ''I'm seven years old.'' ''No, dear, you can't get pregnant...'' Then, the little boy behind the little girl gives her a poke and says, ''See, I told you we had nothing to worry about.''



LMAO!! really funny!

7 seas of Whatever user not visiting Queenzone.com

Bohemian: 115 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 19 Nov 07, 20:41 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Nathan wrote:

A nuclear scientist decided it was time to change careers and became a film director. Unfortunately, all his films bombed at the box office.

Nathan!! Where have you been??


I am the most obsessed Queen fan.
Ms. Rebel user not visiting Queenzone.com
Ms. Rebel
Deity: 3428 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 20 Nov 07, 05:31 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Touch it.


I'm sick of all my kicks.