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Raf user not visiting Queenzone.com
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Raf
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Posted: 20 Dec 07, 13:50 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Stolen from Yogurt on MySpace. :P

ROMANCE MATHEMATICS

Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy
______________________________





OFFICE ARITHMETIC

Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime
_____________________________





SHOPPING MATH

A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs.
A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn't need.
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GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
_____________________________





HAPPINESS

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
______________________________





LONGEVITY

Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.
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PROPENSITY TO CHANGE

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.
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DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE

A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
_____________________________





HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED
Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, 'You're next.' They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.




We got the Cosmos rockin'!

We got the Cosmos rockin'!

We got the Universe rockin'!

We got the Cosmos rockin'!

We got the Cosmos rockin' to the mighty power of rock'n'roll!
Mr.Jingles user not visiting Queenzone.com
Mr.Jingles
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Posted: 20 Dec 07, 15:42 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

IN THE EYES OF A MAN:

Naked good looking woman: Hot
Naked good looking man: Gay
Naked ugly woman: Gross
Naked ugly man: Funny

IN THE EYES OF A WOMAN:

Naked good looking woman: Slut
Naked good looking man: Hot
Naked ugly woman: Pitiful
Naked ugly man: Gross


[QUOTE][QUOTENAME]Brandon wrote: [/QUOTENAME]... and now the "best you can offer is Mr. Jingles? HA! He's... just pathetic.[/QUOTE]
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Posted: 20 Dec 07, 15:45 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

<font color="lime">Raf840 wrote:

Stolen from Yogurt on MySpace. :P


HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED
Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, 'You're next.' They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.



I'm going to start doing that!


[QUOTE][QUOTENAME]Brandon wrote: [/QUOTENAME]... and now the "best you can offer is Mr. Jingles? HA! He's... just pathetic.[/QUOTE]
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Posted: 20 Dec 07, 16:11 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Mr.Jingles wrote:

<font color="lime">Raf840 wrote:

Stolen from Yogurt on MySpace. :P


HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED
Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, 'You're next.' They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.



I'm going to start doing that!


LMAO!!!!


I'm sick of all my kicks.
Raf user not visiting Queenzone.com
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Posted: 20 Dec 07, 17:53 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Mr.Jingles wrote:

IN THE EYES OF A MAN:

Naked good looking woman: Hot
Naked good looking man: Gay
Naked ugly woman: Gross
Naked ugly man: Funny

IN THE EYES OF A WOMAN:

Naked good looking woman: Slut
Naked good looking man: Hot
Naked ugly woman: Pitiful
Naked ugly man: Gross


LOL


We got the Cosmos rockin'!

We got the Cosmos rockin'!

We got the Universe rockin'!

We got the Cosmos rockin'!

We got the Cosmos rockin' to the mighty power of rock'n'roll!
Raf user not visiting Queenzone.com
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Raf
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Posted: 20 Dec 07, 17:53 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Oops, 1 post is enough. ;)


We got the Cosmos rockin'!

We got the Cosmos rockin'!

We got the Universe rockin'!

We got the Cosmos rockin'!

We got the Cosmos rockin' to the mighty power of rock'n'roll!
Sergei. user not visiting Queenzone.com
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Sergei.
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Posted: 20 Dec 07, 18:29 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Mr.Jingles wrote:


IN THE EYES OF A WOMAN:

Naked good looking woman: Slut
Naked good looking man: Hot
Naked ugly woman: Pitiful
Naked ugly man: Gross

This stuff is too sexist. Alluvit. :P

From my own perspective, here's how it'd go:

Naked good looking woman:Thar there's gross. And slut. xD
Naked good looking man: Not quite hot. Also gross.
Naked ugly woman: Funny, but again, a bit gross.
Naked ugly man: Fucking hilarious!

:B

... But seriously, why's all that stuff got to do with guys making the money and the lady's just spending it?! Women DO make money... not by whoring or stealing it from "their man". I'm so sick of all that stereotyping shit. :/


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Posted: 20 Dec 07, 20:49 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

<font color=teal>Cookies?<h6>A Scientist wrote:

Mr.Jingles wrote:


IN THE EYES OF A WOMAN:

Naked good looking woman: Slut
Naked good looking man: Hot
Naked ugly woman: Pitiful
Naked ugly man: Gross


Naked good looking woman:Thar there's gross. And slut. xD
Naked good looking man: Not quite hot. Also gross.



Who (or "what") are you going to fuck then? :P


... But seriously, why's all that stuff got to do with guys making the money and the lady's just spending it?! Women DO make money... not by whoring or stealing it from "their man". I'm so sick of all that stereotyping shit. :/


Chill out, it's only jokes. I acknowledge many women have much more to offer to the world than me. And I'm not talking about breastfeeding.


We got the Cosmos rockin'!

We got the Cosmos rockin'!

We got the Universe rockin'!

We got the Cosmos rockin'!

We got the Cosmos rockin' to the mighty power of rock'n'roll!
Sergei. user not visiting Queenzone.com
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Posted: 20 Dec 07, 21:23 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

<font color="lime">Raf840 wrote:

<font color=teal>Cookies?<h6>A Scientist wrote:

Mr.Jingles wrote:


IN THE EYES OF A WOMAN:

Naked good looking woman: Slut
Naked good looking man: Hot
Naked ugly woman: Pitiful
Naked ugly man: Gross


Naked good looking woman:Thar there's gross. And slut. xD
Naked good looking man: Not quite hot. Also gross.



Who (or "what") are you going to fuck then? :P


... But seriously, why's all that stuff got to do with guys making the money and the lady's just spending it?! Women DO make money... not by whoring or stealing it from "their man". I'm so sick of all that stereotyping shit. :/


Chill out, it's only jokes. I acknowledge many women have much more to offer to the world than me. And I'm not talking about breastfeeding.

It's not you, Raf. It's whoever made the jokes. :P


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Yogurt user not visiting Queenzone.com
Yogurt
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Posted: 21 Dec 07, 01:29 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

RALPH!
You stole that from me!
Hahaha..but at least people laughed.

Dan! That cracked me up!


I don't swim in your toilet, so don't pee in my pool!

its_a_hard_life 26994 user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 21 Dec 07, 05:38 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

:D

Mr.Jingles user not visiting Queenzone.com
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Posted: 21 Dec 07, 11:17 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

<font color=teal>Cookies?<h6>A Scientist wrote:

Mr.Jingles wrote:


IN THE EYES OF A WOMAN:

Naked good looking woman: Slut
Naked good looking man: Hot
Naked ugly woman: Pitiful
Naked ugly man: Gross

This stuff is too sexist. Alluvit. :P

From my own perspective, here's how it'd go:

Naked good looking woman:Thar there's gross. And slut. xD
Naked good looking man: Not quite hot. Also gross.
Naked ugly woman: Funny, but again, a bit gross.
Naked ugly man: Fucking hilarious!

:B

... But seriously, why's all that stuff got to do with guys making the money and the lady's just spending it?! Women DO make money... not by whoring or stealing it from "their man". I'm so sick of all that stereotyping shit. :/


That's what makes it funny!
Not by stereotyping but getting people pissed off.

Although I have to admit that most women won't find a "Naked good looking man" as "Hot".

Most women will find it embarassing and will cover their eyes, but subconsciously they are dying to take a peek.


[QUOTE][QUOTENAME]Brandon wrote: [/QUOTENAME]... and now the "best you can offer is Mr. Jingles? HA! He's... just pathetic.[/QUOTE]