I'm so sorry.
I do hope you and your family are alright.
Death is so unexpected.
It strikes like a flash of lightning.
You don't know when to expect it.
It will take time to recover.
Maybe it's just best that you're grandmother died. She was suffering while she was sick right?
Just remember that she knew that you loved her very much. She will always be in your memories and she will never be forgotten. She's gone physically but not spiritually.
I'm glad your family got some healing.
As for your other problems, I really do hope you get help for dealing with these things. They really are traumatic and you need someone to talk to. You don't need more stress to add to all that. No one deserves that.
But, you will always have us nice people at queenzone. not the evil little people here.
You are very brave. I wish I had the strength you posess.
Hope all goes well. Be well, take care.
"When you make love to someone, use a condom."-Brian May
Paul Rodgers is Chuck Norris.