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Micrówave user not visiting Queenzone.com
Delilah, on Medium Power
Micrówave
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Posted: 02 May 08, 11:18 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Why DID the chicken cross the road?



BARACK OBAMA:



The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a CHANGE! The chicken wanted CHANGE!




JOHN MC CAIN:



My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.




HILLARY CLINTON:



When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure -- right from Day One! -- that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me.......




DR. PHIL:



The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on 'THIS' side of the road before it goes after the problem on the 'OTHER SIDE' of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his 'CURRENT' problems before adding 'NEW' problems.




OPRAH:



Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.




GEORGE W. BUSH:



We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.




COLIN POWELL:



Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road...




ANDERSON COOPER - CNN:



We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.




JOHN KERRY:



Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.




NANCY GRACE:



That chicken crossed the road because he's GUILTY! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.




PAT BUCHANAN:



To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.




MARTHA STEWART:



No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.




DR SEUSS:



Did the chicken cross the road?
Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes, the chicken crossed the road,
but why it crossed I've not been told.




ERNEST HEMINGWAY:



To die in the rain. Alone.




JERRY FALWELL:



Because the chicken was gay! Can't you people see the plain truth?' That's why they call it the 'other side.' Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media white washes with seemingly harmless phrases like 'the other side. That chicken should not be crossing the road. It's as plain and as simple as that.




GRANDPA:



In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.





JoxerTheDeityPirate user not visiting Queenzone.com
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Posted: 02 May 08, 11:26 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Fatty ate the chicken,problem solved


isnt innuendo an italian suppository?

im gonna ride the wild wind!

its_a_hard_life wrote:you nutcase you rule!

joxer replies: but in a nice way :-]

Serry... user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 02 May 08, 12:16 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Devastatingly funny!

Donna13 user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 02 May 08, 12:32 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

That was very good.

eenaweena. user not visiting Queenzone.com
eenaweena.
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Posted: 06 May 08, 23:52 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

wow.

its_a_hard_life 26994 user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 07 May 08, 03:07 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

LMAO.

:D


Woodie user not visiting Queenzone.com
I'm with the band.
Woodie
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Posted: 07 May 08, 06:32 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

FUNNY :D Thanks.


The colours that you bring are the basis of everything.
Jeroen user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 07 May 08, 07:54 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

I thought this one was about Niek...!?


Roger AAAAAHHHH!
Mr.Jingles user not visiting Queenzone.com
Mr.Jingles
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Posted: 07 May 08, 23:02 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

TREASURE MOMENT:



The chicken crossed the road because he was following Freddie's footsteps. Along the way the chicken found that Treasure Moment was following these steps, and the chicken realized that TM was on it's way to becoming the greatest rock band on earth, and become the ultimate music legends who have resurrected the essence of Freddie's holy God spirit.



JAKE BRITT:



The chicken crossed the road because it's sick and tired of Barry O'Neal spamming his inbox with death threats, so the chicken decided to go to the shop across the street, buy a kitchen knife, and be on it's way to settle things with Barry for once and for good. After achieving victory marked by blood, and putting an end to the suffering and pain brought by Barry the chicken will live a happy life and will stop shoving prescription pills down it's troath, writing shitty poetry, and listening to emo bands.




WILLIAM K MAHLER:



(singing in poor Bruce Springsteen style:)
The chicken crossed
...I say the chicken
...crossed to road
crossed the road to a better future.

A future for America
The chicken turned on FOX News
...and the chicken saw
the chicken saw a dark future

The chicken no longer wants
Yeeeeeahh!! he no longer wants...

...to be chicken.

The chicken said...
Yeah, the chicken said...
I want to fight for freedom
Yeeeeeahh... fight for freedom!

The freedom for children in America
to live free
Yeah, to live free!

The chicken wants to kill
Yes! he wants to kill!
Commies and Terrorists

Yeaaah, commies and terrorists.



[QUOTE][QUOTENAME]Brandon wrote: [/QUOTENAME]... and now the "best you can offer is Mr. Jingles? HA! He's... just pathetic.[/QUOTE]
Erin user not visiting Queenzone.com
Erin
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Posted: 08 May 08, 10:36 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

^^LOL

bobo the chimp user not visiting Queenzone.com
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Posted: 08 May 08, 11:00 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

HEATH LEDGER:

.....

(I'm dead)

.....



"Your not funny, your not a good musician, theres a difference between being funny and being an idiot, you obviously being the latter" - Dave R Fuller
Micrówave user not visiting Queenzone.com
Delilah, on Medium Power
Micrówave
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Posted: 08 May 08, 11:18 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Hey this is fun. Please, don't anybody get their "feathers ruffled".

Greg Brooks


For my next research project, I'm needing a list of all the chickens out there. I'd also like to know the locations of intersections used. In exchange I will give you all something VERY special from the Chicken Archives.


Haystacks Calhounski


To shag a hen. Ah yes.


Andreas Mercury


The chickens kicked me out of the coup. If they let me back in I promise to let you all know why. Please McMax, McAmir...




Microwave


I don't see why some of you have a problem with the chicken. Get over it, knuckleheads.


Mooghead


lol @ chicken


Louvox


To sell his Hot Space CD. It's absolute garbage.


Various Queenzoners


Can we please BAN the chicken?


History Girl


The first pictures of chickens in Europe are found on Corinthian pottery of the 7th century BCE. The poet Cratinus (mid-5th century BCE, according to the later Greek author Athenaeus) calls the chicken "the Persian alarm". In Aristophanes's comedy The Birds (414 BCE) a chicken is called "the Median bird", which points to an introduction from the East. Pictures of chickens are found on Greek red figure and black-figure pottery.

In ancient Greece, chickens were still rare and were a rather prestigious food for symposia. Delos seems to have been a centre of chicken breeding.

An early domestication of chickens in Southeast Asia is probable, since the word for domestic chicken (*manuk) is part of the reconstructed Proto-Austronesian language (see Austronesian languages). Chickens, together with dogs and pigs, were the domestic animals of the Lapita culture, the first Neolithic culture of Oceania.

Chickens were spread by Polynesian seafarers and reached Easter Island in the 12th century BCE, where they were the only domestic animal, with the possible exception of the Polynesian Rat (Rattus exulans). They were housed in extremely solid chicken coops built from stone. Traveling as cargo on trading boats, they reached the Asian continent via the islands of Indonesia and from there spread west to Europe and western Asia.

The Romans used chickens for oracles, both when flying ("ex avibus") and when feeding ("auspicium ex tripudiis"). The hen ("gallina") gave a favourable omen ("auspicium ratum"), when appearing from the left (Cic.,de Div. ii.26), like the crow and the owl.

For the oracle "ex tripudiis" according to Cicero (Cic. de Div. ii.34), any bird could be used, but normally only chickens ("pulli") were consulted. The chickens were cared for by the pullarius, who opened their cage and fed them pulses or a special kind of soft cake when an augury was needed. If the chickens stayed in their cage, made noises ("occinerent"), beat their wings or flew away, the omen was bad; if they ate greedily, the omen was good.

In 249 BCE, the Roman general Publius Claudius Pulcher had his chickens thrown overboard when they refused to feed before the battle of Drepana, saying "If they won't eat, perhaps they will drink." He promptly lost the battle against the Carthaginians and 93 Roman ships were sunk. Back in Rome, he was tried for impiety and heavily fined.

In 161 BCE a law was passed in Rome that forbade the consumption of fattened chickens. It was renewed a number of times, but does not seem t

bobo the chimp user not visiting Queenzone.com
bobo the chimp
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Posted: 08 May 08, 11:39 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Man I can totally impersonate myself

ZEBONKA12 :

Actually it's interesting, the chicken was seen in a rare interview just last week

http://img392.imageshack.us/img392/9162/chickenvb1.jpg

PS. WHY DOESN'T THIS WOMAN LOVE ME, WAH WAH



"Your not funny, your not a good musician, theres a difference between being funny and being an idiot, you obviously being the latter" - Dave R Fuller
StoneColdClassicQueen user not visiting Queenzone.com
I need a haircut.
StoneColdClassicQueen
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Posted: 08 May 08, 20:50 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Zebonka12 wrote:

Man I can totally impersonate myself

ZEBONKA12 :

Actually it's interesting, the chicken was seen in a rare interview just last week

http://img392.imageshack.us/img392/9162/chickenvb1.jpg

PS. WHY DOESN'T THIS WOMAN LOVE ME, WAH WAH


XDDDDDDD
that just made my day..
seriously!!!!
hmm... what would be mine???
I have to think about that..


"When you make love to someone, use a condom."-Brian May

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Paul Rodgers is Chuck Norris.