Forums > Personal > Hecklers And Their Putdowns

forum rss feed
Author

mr mercury user not visiting Queenzone.com
Adam who?????
mr mercury
Deity: 4632 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 16 May 08, 14:19 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

This appeared in todays Daily Record so I put this here as I thought it would give you a laugh.

Showbiz veteran Cilla Black has called for a heckler from 22 years ago to come forward.

The star, who is set to appear in panto again in Liverpool this December, says she would like to meet the lad in the audience who suggested the best way to kill the baddie in Aladdin would be for Cilla to "sing to him".

Here we take a look at some of the best known heckling lines and some of their even wittier responses.

Halfway through a U2 gig in Glasgow, Bono stopped to tell the audience that "every time I clap my hands, a child in Africa dies". A Glaswegian voice from the back shouted, "Well stop clapping your fucking hands then".

Comedian David Baddiel was on stage telling a story about a comedian floundering on stage when someone shouted: "Nobody likes you. Surely you remember that from school".

A heckler at a Ryan Adams concert shouted out a request for Summer Of 69. The singer paid the audience member the cost of his ticket and made hime leave.

At another concert where the American singer was singing in the dark, a member of the crowd complained she couldnt see his face. The singer lit a lighter under his chin and told her to go see Coldplay.

During a performance one evening comedian Billy Connolly was interrupted by an obnoxious heckler. Fortunately Connolly had a ready reply. "When they put teeth in your mouth," he declared, "They spoiled a perfectly good arse."

A stage performance of The Diary Of Anne Frank was so bad the the arrival of the Germans was greeted with a shout of "She's in the attic."

British comedian Eddie Izzard responded to an outburst with an encouraging, "Check your joke with your friend first and if he thinks its funny give it a try."

At a Billy Bragg gig a couple of years ago in Barking, the singer was seen to take repeated long swigs of tea from a mug. After this happened a few times, a voice from the crowd cried out: "All right, we know you've got fucking mugs for sale ya bastard."

The 18th century troublemaker, politician and journalist John Wilkes was heckled by a man who cried; "vote for you? I'd sooner vote for the devil." To which Wilkes replied: "And what if your friend isnt standing?"

Veteran actor Kirk Douglas's other son Peter once had a go at being a stand up comic to no success whatsoever. When he was on tour the bored audiences started to heckle the son of the man who once played Spartacus. Eventually he lost the plot and demanded of the jeering crowd, "Dont you know who I am? I'm Kirk Douglas's son!" To which a member of the audience replied "No, I'm Kirk Douglas's son!"

One time a heckler called out to American comedian Rodney Dangerfield: "Hey Rodney, what do you do for a living?" Rodney replied, "I find men for your sister."

British comedian Roy Chubby Brown once dealt with a heckler by interrupting his act and asking the audience member in question, "Is your mother a weightlifter? No? Then how did she raise a dumbbell like you?"


"Normally i can't dance to save my life.

But as soon as I step in dog shit, I can moonwalk better than Michael Jackson."
YourValentine user not visiting Queenzone.com
registered July 27th 2001
YourValentine
Deity: 7611 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 17 May 08, 04:44 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

"Halfway through a U2 gig in Glasgow, Bono stopped to tell the audience that "every time I clap my hands, a child in Africa dies". A Glaswegian voice from the back shouted, "Well stop clapping your fucking hands then"."

Could have been fatty:)


I do not want any google ads here.

JoxerTheDeityPirate user not visiting Queenzone.com
JoxerTheDeityPirate
Deity: 6272 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 17 May 08, 05:15 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

my fave one was at Glastonbury a few years back when Bono was doing his 'make poverty history' speech and the audience shouted back at him 'make Bono history'.
nice to be wanted isnt it? :-]

i 'met' roy chubby brown in the late 80's when he was on tour in Scotland.he barged pass me at the bar spilling my beer so i gave him a mouthful of abuse [not realising who he was].i then had to squirm in my seat the whole evening as he hurled abuse back at me throughout his act.
'one was not amused'


isnt innuendo an italian suppository?

im gonna ride the wild wind!

its_a_hard_life wrote:you nutcase you rule!

joxer replies: but in a nice way :-]