its been a while since the last story of simple folk and i thought you would all need a comedown after the footie tournament somewhere in Europe
so grab a coffee and make yourself comfortable...
today,Fatty & Janet visit a music shop:
Today Fatty is going to a music shop.his harmonica is making weird noises and needs to be repaired.he puts on his blue sequined satin lapelled napolean jacket with all the trimmings and puts his harmonica in the top pocket.can you look like Sergeant Pepper,Fatty can.
Fatty and Janet make their way down the street to the music shop,Fatty is playing hop-scotch on the way [see the cracked pavement].when they get there Janet decides to pop next door to the florist and pick up a cactus for the garden.
"right Fatty" says Janet,"im just going in the florist for 5 minutes while you get your harmonica repaired.you behave yourself"
"yes" says Fatty in a camp John Inman voice "i will"
Fatty goes into the music shop and sees the owner,Mr Wring.
Mr Wring greets Fatty with open arms and says "thank God you are here.ive got a delivery out the back of the shop and i need someone to serve for 5 minutes while im gone.can you do it for me Fatty?"
"yes" lisps Fatty "i'll be gald too"
Mr Wring leaves Fatty in charge of the counter and goes out the back to sort out his delivery.As he does so,3 young women come into the shop.Fatty greets them all and the 3 women reply with a 'hi'
"where is Roger,the owner?" asks the first woman,who's name is Sparrow "ive got a problem with the rare bass guitar i brought here last week.i cant get the bottom string to loosen.its too tight and i cant get my hand under it to play it properly"
Fatty looks at the make of the guitar and sees that it is indeed a rare make of guitar.do you think Kamaltow is a strange name for a guitar? Fatty does.
Fatty says "let me have a look,oh,i can mend this" and gets out his allen key and untightens the string for Sparrow.
"wow" says Sparrow "thats fantastic, im gonna play my bass by myself in the corner while you serve my 2 friends here"
the other 2 girls introduce themselves as Freya and Jesska.Freya is sounding a little croaky as she has a throat infection.
"hi" whispers Freya "we are a duo and are looking for a 3rd person to join our band,can we put up a sign in the shop advertising for a harmonica player please?"
"ooh" says Fatty "i play the harmonica,can i audition please?"
he takes out his dust covered harmonica from his shirt pocket and shows Freya
"oh,its a bit dusty isnt it?" says Freya "let me clean it up a bit for you"
she takes out her tissue from her handbag and breathes on the harmonica and then cleans it with the tissue
"let me see if i can play something on it" says Freya's friend Jesska and she plays the opening few bars of 'blowing in the wind' by Bob Dylan
"its quite good considering the harmonica is about 40 years old" says Jesska "would you like to join our band?"
"i'll have to ask Janet" says Fatty and then realises that he was meant to meet her outside.As it happens Mr Wring comes back through to the front of the shop just as Fatty is thinking this and says to Fatty that the delivery is done now and that he has been very helpful.
Fatty goes outside and sees Janet waiting impatiently in the street with the cactus in her hands.
"where have you been?" she asks crossly
"well" says Fatty "i was in the shop and 3 young women came in looking for Roger Wring.i said i would be glad to help them.the first woman was having problems with a Kameltow so i loosened her G-STRING for her until she was able to get all her fingers underneath and play with herself in the corner of the shop."
"her 2 friends were looking for someone to join them in a threesome and asked if i wanted to join them.the first woman called Freya breathed heavily on my old organ and then wiped it clean with a tissue so her friend Jesska could play with it afterwards.Jesska was quite impressed with how well it played considering i
isnt innuendo an italian suppository?
im gonna ride the wild wind!
its_a_hard_life wrote:you nutcase you rule!
joxer replies: but in a nice way :-]