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Mr.Jingles
Deity: 10545 posts
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Aside from the FACT that his band is band is the greatest thing on earth since Queen, there are other unknown facts about Treasure Moment that many of you might know. FACT #1: Freddie Mercury caught AIDS on purpose after an oracle predicted the coming of Treasure Moment. Not being willing to be overshadowed by someone with more talent, Freddie went to San Francisco and had unprotected sex for an entire month. Despite what most people believe, Freddie Mercury was actually straight. FACT #2: While Mozart composed his first piece at the age of 3, Treasure Moment composed his first piece while being a sperm traveling through his mother's womb. FACT #3: Brian May was able to build his guitar from fireplace wood. Treasure Moment on the other hand, built his own band by cloning himself 4 times. After he realized that no matter how many auditions he would hold, still he could never find someone as talented as himself. FACT #4: Treasure Moment is the only person on earth capable of playing the piano with his cock (no hands). FACT #5: Paganini sold his soul to Satan in exchange for outstanding violin playing skills. Centuries later Satan would sell his soul to Treasure Moment to become his roadie. FACT #6: Millions of mothers hoping to have an offspring with extraordinary musical talent have made requests to sperm banks for Treasure Moment's semen. Treasure Moment's cum is priced at $5000 per drop, but due to scheduling conflicts while working on his next masterpiece, Treasure Moment has only been able to provide man-goo for only a few of his fans. At the sperm bank Treasure Moment masturbated while listening to his own music, while dropping loads of talent inside a cup.
[QUOTE][QUOTENAME]Brandon wrote: [/QUOTENAME]... and now the "best you can offer is Mr. Jingles? HA! He's... just pathetic.[/QUOTE]
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Mr.Jingles
Deity: 10545 posts
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[QUOTE][QUOTENAME]Brandon wrote: [/QUOTENAME]... and now the "best you can offer is Mr. Jingles? HA! He's... just pathetic.[/QUOTE]
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Yara
Royalty: 1430 posts
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Freddie is God. That's a fact he got right. ;-))
Yara
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Mr.Jingles
Deity: 10545 posts
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Yara wrote: Freddie is God. That's a fact he got right. ;-)) That might be a true fact considering that every guy he fucked in the ass was screaming... OH GOD!!
[QUOTE][QUOTENAME]Brandon wrote: [/QUOTENAME]... and now the "best you can offer is Mr. Jingles? HA! He's... just pathetic.[/QUOTE]
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thomasquinn 32989
Deity: 6442 posts
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You know what they say...if enough people believe it, it becomes true. And Freddie fucked a *lot* of people. So it might turn out that TM was indeed right on one count. Just one question remains: will the universe end now that has happened?
Not Plutus but Apollo rules Parnassus
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Yara
Royalty: 1430 posts
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Mr.Jingles wrote: Yara wrote: Freddie is God. That's a fact he got right. ;-)) That might be a true fact considering that every guy he fucked in the ass was screaming... OH GOD!! Very likely. Those listening to him sing or play the piano too. "Oh, God, what a wonderful musician". So, this one it seems he really got right. ;-)) That's a fact, yeah. :o)
Yara
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Micrówave
Delilah, on Medium Power
Deity: 7038 posts
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FACTS? Or just folklore? (See Mr. Jingles post for reference) FACT #1 folklore. It wasn't San Francisco, it was Des Moines, Iowa. FACT #2 Fact. Members of the band Europe were being treated for a gerbilectomy and a couple overheard this tune and made a hit out of it. TM was never compensated. The court ruled the statute of limitations had been reached. FACT #3: Fact. A record amount of DNA was produced in the course of 3 months thanks to a video membership to "The Tool Box", Iran's underground gay movie rental store. FACT #4: Folklore. Ill-equiped. Unfortunately he is not able to even play the first 6 notes of chopsticks with it. FACT #5: Unknown. No shows yet. Stay Tuned, there's a huge one coming... FACT #6: Folklore. You don't want to cause world-wide panic, do you Jingles?
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Winter Land Man
Jake
Deity: 4400 posts
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Mr.Jingles wrote: Aside from the FACT that his band is band is the greatest thing on earth since Queen, there are other unknown facts about Treasure Moment that many of you might know. FACT #1: Freddie Mercury caught AIDS on purpose after an oracle predicted the coming of Treasure Moment. Not being willing to be overshadowed by someone with more talent, Freddie went to San Francisco and had unprotected sex for an entire month. Despite what most people believe, Freddie Mercury was actually straight. FACT #2: While Mozart composed his first piece at the age of 3, Treasure Moment composed his first piece while being a sperm traveling through his mother's womb. FACT #3: Brian May was able to build his guitar from fireplace wood. Treasure Moment on the other hand, built his own band by cloning himself 4 times. After he realized that no matter how many auditions he would hold, still he could never find someone as talented as himself. FACT #4: Treasure Moment is the only person on earth capable of playing the piano with his cock (no hands). FACT #5: Paganini sold his soul to Satan in exchange for outstanding violin playing skills. Centuries later Satan would sell his soul to Treasure Moment to become his roadie. FACT #6: Millions of mothers hoping to have an offspring with extraordinary musical talent have made requests to sperm banks for Treasure Moment's semen. Treasure Moment's cum is priced at $5000 per drop, but due to scheduling conflicts while working on his next masterpiece, Treasure Moment has only been able to provide man-goo for only a few of his fans. At the sperm bank Treasure Moment masturbated while listening to his own music, while dropping loads of talent inside a cup. LMAO!
"Please buy my upcoming album... I need the money"
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Mr Mercury
Adam who?????
Deity: 4670 posts
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Mr Jingles and microwave have just brightened my day!!! LMAO
"Normally i can't dance to save my life.
But as soon as I step in dog shit, I can moonwalk better than Michael Jackson."
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Micrówave
Delilah, on Medium Power
Deity: 7038 posts
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I submit to Jingles on this one. I'm just merely riding his coat tails.
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StoneColdClassicQueen
I need a haircut.
Bohemian: 775 posts
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Treasure Moment can kick Chuck Norris' ass.
"When you make love to someone, use a condom."-Brian May
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Paul Rodgers is Chuck Norris.
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StoneColdClassicQueen
I need a haircut.
Bohemian: 775 posts
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Mr Mercury wrote: Mr Jingles and microwave have just brightened my day!!! LMAO I just love your quote. Where did you get it?? XD
"When you make love to someone, use a condom."-Brian May
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Paul Rodgers is Chuck Norris.
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inu-liger
Deity: 13186 posts
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Wow. I'm amazed. A "Treasure Moment" topic with over TEN posts without a reply from the shithead himself yet?? Bloody hell. I think we've stumped him for once :-)
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Treasure Moment
Deity: 3413 posts
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inu-liger wrote: Wow. I'm amazed. A "Treasure Moment" topic with over TEN posts without a reply from the shithead himself yet?? Bloody hell. I think we've stumped him for once :-) not really, i just find this amusing.
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StoneColdClassicQueen
I need a haircut.
Bohemian: 775 posts
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Treasure Moment wrote: inu-liger wrote: Wow. I'm amazed. A "Treasure Moment" topic with over TEN posts without a reply from the shithead himself yet?? Bloody hell. I think we've stumped him for once :-) not really, i just find this amusing. ooh! did you like mine?????
"When you make love to someone, use a condom."-Brian May
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Paul Rodgers is Chuck Norris.
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-fatty- 2850
Deity: 2029 posts
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Treasure Moment take their name from the delightful few seconds of peace that appear between the tracks on their CD. Treasure Moment are the reason that there's no such thing as a television programme called 'Sweden Has Talent'. If all the plastic from all the Treasure Moment CDs that have ever been sold were to be recycled, there would be enough raw material to make as many as three bin liners. If all the electrical cables used at an average Treasure Moment concert were laid end to end, there still wouldn't be enough to tie the band up with and throw them into a canal. A record executive told the band that a sure-fire way to generate public interest in the band was for one of them to die. After listening to their demo, the record executive decided that not only would the whole band have to die, so would most of their friends and family. Treasure Moment has the only fan club in the world where the band out-numbers the fans five to one. Treaure Moment were almost booked to play at the opening ceremony of the Special Olympics in Beijing. Organisers changed their mind after seeing them perform as they wanted to play down the "completely retarded" angle. Treasure Moment are the only band in the world to know fewer chords than Status Quo. If you were to play a selection of Treasure Moment songs within 15 feet of Freddie Mercury's corpse for just ten minutes, the spinning would produce enough energy to light Las Vegas for a decade. Scientists have discovered a unique effect that comes from playing Treasure Moment CDs. Apon hearing their god-awful excuse for rock music, the listeners will to live begins to seep out of his or her body and can be seen as a transparent layer covering the ground and objects nearby. fatty.
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The Fairy King
Deity: 8885 posts
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3 topics about TM? Don't you think that's a little too much attention?
We love you Mandy!
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Mr Mercury
Adam who?????
Deity: 4670 posts
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Treasure Moment's original guitarist was fired for being able to play the chord F sharp. Similarly, the original keyboard player was fired for boasting he knew what the plug on his keyboard was for. And for telling the rest of the band about this new fangled thing called "electricity" and what is was for.
"Normally i can't dance to save my life.
But as soon as I step in dog shit, I can moonwalk better than Michael Jackson."
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john bodega
Deity: 12775 posts
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There was no gunman in Dallas, on November 22nd 1963. JFK heard "Forgotten One" and his head asplode.
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its_a_hard_life 26994
Deity: 11046 posts
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Mr Mercury wrote: Treasure Moment's original guitarist was fired for being able to play the chord F sharp. Similarly, the original keyboard player was fired for boasting he knew what the plug on his keyboard was for. And for telling the rest of the band about this new fangled thing called "electricity" and what is was for. XDDDDD
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