- Harmonizing pills
This, my dear friends, is no less than a secret kept for more than 30 years. But that's not the case anymore, since here in Shredmdicine we bring you the truth at all cost.
If you are a musician, you've probably heard about Brian May, that guy-with-the-curly-hair from the band named Queen. What's more, you've probably heard his splendid solos and guitar arrangements, which often include from 3 to 7 (yes... seven!) guitars.
Well here's a little secret, my friends: This dude Brian May is no genius at all. It just happens that back in 1971 he came up with this pills known as harmonizing pills (in slang they're also called "the harmys", e.g: "Hey Dude, got a Harmy? Need to compose a three-part harmony"). This is no joke, these pills are the real shit. The thing is they are very hard to get, which in part explains the reason why few guitarist know how to harmonize and build up great solos.
It is not clear how did brian may manage to get these pills in the first place, but the legend tells that he had a friend which actually came up with the formula to make them (Brian May had a lot of geek friends).
Here in ShredMedicine we cannot tell you how to get these pills, for it may cost us our lives. We do not want to unleash the fury of shred dealers!
Next, we offer you a shortened version of the pills' prospect:
Action: Harmonizing Pills, sold under the name "Harmonix", which come in quantities of 93 and 890 mg, are powerful brain chemistry activators, which allow the user to think more clearly in terms of harmonizing different notes.
Common side effects may include:
- Delirium Shreddens (Trying to harmonize too many notes, which in turn may cause brain seizures)
- Brian May's Syndrome: The user may become a Jimmy Page Fan (also known as deaf person's soapbox syndrome)
- Anal Shred Hallucinations: do we need to explain?