Forums > Personal > Do you think polyamorous relationships would work?

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KWaters user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 08 Jul 20, 10:18 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Hi, I think a polyamorous relationship will work provided that all three had agreed to certain terms. If that satisfies them, let them be. You should check this link http://passionmature.com

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Posted: 09 Jul 20, 14:45 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote



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Posted: 09 Jul 20, 14:48 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

I think yes, I work as an SEO at https://www.seoplanner.com/ and sometimes I do not have much time to attend only to my girlfriend, I talked to her and we met a friend and we ended up joining our relationship, that is, we love each other and everything works for us and the sex is a plus but it is equal to another normal relationship

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Posted: 09 Jul 20, 14:52 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

I think yes, I work as an SEO and sometimes I do not have much time to attend only to my girlfriend, I talked to her and we met a friend and we ended up joining our relationship, that is, we love each other and everything works for us and the sex is a plus but it is equal to another normal relationship


john bodega user not visiting Queenzone.com
john bodega
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Posted: 10 Jul 20, 07:02 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

never met a polygamist that wasn't an asshole.

The Real Wizard user not visiting Queenzone.com
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Posted: 10 Jul 20, 21:03 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

john bodega wrote:

never met a polygamist that wasn't an asshole.


This thread is about polyamory, not polygamy. They are massively different things.



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Posted: 11 Jul 20, 14:24 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

I think it can work for some people. Not in my case, but my personal experience doesn't necessarily transfer to the rest of the population - in fact, it'd be quite daft to think otherwise IMNHO.


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Posted: 11 Jul 20, 14:52 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

The answer to “would it work” is an unequivocal no. You hear of many couples being married for 50, 60, even 70 years at times. Name one union of 3 or more that has lasted that long. I’ll wait.




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The Real Wizard user not visiting Queenzone.com
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Posted: 11 Jul 20, 21:28 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

MyHumanZoo wrote:

The answer to “would it work” is an unequivocal no. You hear of many couples being married for 50, 60, even 70 years at times. Name one union of 3 or more that has lasted that long. I’ll wait.


Longevity doesn't necessarily imply happiness. How many couples married for 50-70 years are truly happy? How about the catholic ones who feel they just can't leave because it's "not the catholic thing to do" ? The global divorce rate is teetering around 50% (with an emphasis on countries where people are more educated and women have jobs) - and that doesn't include the ones who remain unhappily married. Ashley Madison has 60 million users.

People are cluing into the fact that the old models aren't working anymore, but due to stigmas around different relationship models, most people who engage in them don't broadcast it. Their primary partner is just said to be their partner, because they realize that most people who still blindly and uncritically follow today's increasingly outdated socio-Christian derived monogamous relationship model likely won't be able to transcend their prejudice and ignorance to understand what people different from them are up to. All the power to them, but plenty of them aren't happy.

Anecdotal it may be, but most of the truly fulfilled people I've observed in my adult life have opted out of traditional lifestyle choices - anything from relationships to work to how they spend their free time. And if their relationships don't last 50 years, it doesn't mean they're any less fulfilling. If anything, the wider variety of life experience may well help make them more well-rounded people.

And of course different relationship models are not a new thing. Plenty of societies in times past thrived with a variety of them. There is much literature on this if you're curious enough.



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MyHumanZoo user not visiting Queenzone.com
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Posted: 16 Jul 20, 19:35 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

But there are many of those 50-70 year relationships, and you can't just say they all weren't happy. There are people that have been married for 60+ years, one person dies and the other dies within hours or days because they cannot go on without each other. So I will still wait to hear of even one single amorous relationship of more than 2 people that has lasted that long.




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Posted: 16 Jul 20, 21:26 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

I think it depends on the people I know two guys that have been together for years and they have sexual relations outside their own relationship and always have. They seem content happy and no jealousy between them. I definately think rules would apply in these situations like they don’t do certain things with their one night stands. They reserve that intimacy for one another. I’m friends with both of them and visit often but we have a rule when they are having company I don’t visit.If you know what I mean .it’s not for me I’m a traditional girl but I did have a girlfriend in middle school through high school. I struggled a lot with my sexual identity in those years and in my senior year I left her and realized I preferred male partners. I still find women attractive but Imy attraction to men is much stronger.Im a traditional woman I guess but I don’t think I could share my man with a woman. I’m not sure about a man but not a woman for sure.

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Posted: 16 Jul 20, 21:29 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

I can take care of a man real nicely and I’m jealious it wouldn’t work lol!

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Posted: 17 Jul 20, 01:54 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

MyHumanZoo wrote:

But there are many of those 50-70 year relationships, and you can't just say they all weren't happy.

I didn't say that. Nobody in the history of humanity has said that. Saying plenty aren't happy isn't the same as saying none are happy.

I will still wait to hear of even one single amorous relationship of more than 2 people that has lasted that long.

Are we talking about happiness or longevity? Because you're stuck in the "longevity = happy" mindset, as if that's the only (or best) kind of happy and that they're one and the same. Of course there's nothing inherently wrong with that, but as long as you're there, you're missing the point.

Merely making the decision to stay with someone for a half century is not a sign of happiness in and of itself. Apart from biological and environmental factors beyond our control, generally people are happy because they make better life choices for themselves - not because they engage in activity X longer than others. Do we think people who have had the same job for 50 years have had a more fulfilling career than people who worked ten jobs, or freelanced all over the world? Why should it be any different for relationships?

Why do you equate happiness with longevity ? Is it somehow measurably true that people in relationships lasting 50 years are happier than people in one that's lasted five years ?



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Posted: 17 Jul 20, 19:00 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

I equate happiness with longevity because we are gifted a life of free will. People are not required to be married that long, and if they are unhappy, there are easy ways to leave the marriage. There would not be so many long marriages if all those people were unhappy with each other and that relationship. They may be unhappy with other parts of their lives. I will grant you, perhaps there are some long marriages where those in them were not happy, and they stayed together out of obligation, financial reason...or just plain laziness. But I think in this society where lack of commitment seems to run rampant, most people get out if they think they aren’t happy.

I can say, I personally know of many couples that have been married over 50 and 60 years because they are happy and insanely in love with their spouses...including my own parents! So it does happen, and it happens frequently.

As far as work longevity and happiness, that can be somewhat different. It used to be that pensions were pretty significant at some companies, so staying for a long time paid off, and I’m sure many people endured jobs they weren’t happy with for the payout in the end. Nowadays, it can be easier to move from job to job, but when benefits and pay levels are involved, people stay places where they aren’t happy. You can’t really equate job happiness with marriage happiness, where jobs are basically required (generalizing a bit) and marriage is voluntary.

Chevy I get what you are saying, but that is really more of an open marriage, where you have a couple that agrees to let each other have sex outside their relationship. We’re talking about basically a long term relationship or marriage between 3 or more people exclusively.




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Posted: 17 Jul 20, 22:01 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

MyHumanZoo, I don’t think I could allow my man or if I were divorced and in a relationship with another man have a free for all with another lady. I would be tempted to knock him upside his head or possible snatch something off. He wouldn’t be able to find pleasure again.Im jealious with my men though. If they are mine they are mine. I find much love and emotional stability with the male species.My grandparents were married till they died my grandfather wasn’t very kind to my uncle he was Gay. This hurt my grandma very badly but she stayed till death did them part. Women stayed with the fathers of their children back then I guess. I think I get what your saying and everyone is entitled to their opinions. I’m just saying I don’t think I could share my man with a woman the way I figure it they have something you need pack your bags and leave with them Felicia lol!

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Posted: 17 Jul 20, 22:14 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

My humanzoo, How could a man even suggest you do that ? I have to be the important one anyway I like lots of attention. I’m kinda spoiled so someone else stealing my thunder no way. I’m gonna be honest I have had one male sex partner my whole life and I’m not ashamed either. I have friends though that have had many.I have had more than one female partner but only one male partner who I’m married too. I couldn’t imagine that at all. Would you sleep all together. I get the left side that’s my favorite. Oh boy this is something else. On tv a man has six wives they all take turns and have their own bedrooms and have kids by him too. I bet he is exhausted. That’s a polygamist right.

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Posted: 17 Jul 20, 23:00 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

This site I don’t believe in the beginning was created for some of these conversations. But I guess that’s we’re it’s taking us I’m a very open minded person but some stuff we can offend people. I think they need to shut all these Queen sites down . Do they even bother to monitor things probably not. That’s why I haven’t been around. I’m glad books are coming out for some of you guys. Maybe it will keep you busy. I have already set it in stone I quit my fb first and I’m dropping this place. This is too much.First we use the F word which I hate. To me it a hate word. Then the bullying now this boredom is a disease.

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Posted: 18 Jul 20, 12:51 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

EDIT: Forgive me. I tried to use the quote feature and ended up making it look as if Wizard had said everything below. Someday I will figure out the quote feature. At least i have buttons now. : )



Real Wizard wrote: As long as there's open communication and no feelings of jealousy, then great - I wish everyone well.

I read a lot of threads on QZ, but participate in a very small number. However, I have found this topic to be interesting. Though simplistic, I think Wizard has summed up my personal viewpoint.

Having said that,this is the Personal forum for QZ and as stated in the description, anything goes. I appreciate having a place where we can freely discuss anything of interest and i also appreciate that the rest of the forums/threads are devoted to Queen. I have made some very good friends here and I'm glad for the freedom to take our conversations wherever they lead. Though not monitored as well as it could be, I have found the administrators respond fairly quickly to requests. The language can be offensive at times, but I would be hypocritical if I said that i never use those words. People are free to come and go here, but I'm glad that there are Queen sites out there that allow all of us to enjoy each other and the band. Long live QZ and Queenchat and any other sites that allow me to indulge in my obsession!


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Posted: 19 Jul 20, 18:20 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

I agree Katydid, when it comes to my own personal feelings as to what people do in their relationships, I don’t really care as long as they are happy. I think my point is just that I have never heard or know of anyone in multiples having long term relationships. If they could manage it, good luck with that and enjoy it, I guess! I am with Chevy as far as for myself, I would not allow any other person in my relationship. Not because I’m that jealous, but because I think it’s hard enough to get along with 1 other person, let alone 2 or more, lol! But actually, since I am a Christian it is not allowable in my faith and I would not do it anyway.




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Posted: 19 Jul 20, 18:43 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Humanzoo, It is hard enough too maintain communication with one person your so right amen to that one.