Forums > Personal > Were/Are you bullied at school?

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Flashman user not visiting Queenzone.com
Flashman
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Posted: 27 May 04, 12:41 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

If so, I'm sure it will be the making of you.

There's been a lot of talk in these parts that we shouldn't make fun of folk just because they're different. Gammon! It's what makes the world go around. Survival of the fittest, and all that rot.

It puts me in mind of a creature from my school days who we used to call Weasel due to his gaunt, pointy-faced, scrawny appearance. Now and again he'd wet himself like a big girl and we'd call him April (as in 'showers'). I never took the trouble to learn his real name - it didn't seem important, just so long as he had a bit of tuck money and completed my homework on time.

My partner in crime Tupper Clayton and I used to make his life a living Hell, roasting him over bonfires and painting his arse purple - you know the kind of thing, harmless fun. The Masters were no better and in fact actively encouraged it. In particular the games tutor, Bumper Norris, went out of his way to add to Weasel's woe, making him play Rugby naked or do press-ups in the mud. A terrific hoot, was old Bumper.

Anyroad, who should I bump into at the Golf Club Annual Ball last night but Weasel himself? I thought the only thing he'd amount to would be having a padded cell to call his own, but apparently he's now a Labour councillor. So I suppose in a way, I wasn't far wrong. He's typical Lefty material - wet as a virgin's nob-end.

He looked startled to see me, so to put him at his ease I gave him a manly slap between the shoulder blades, causing him to half choke on his Melton Mowbray. He immediately started toadying, lying through his teeth about how pleased he was to see me and introduced me to his delectable wife Mrs. Weasel. How this slimy chump ended up with such an enchanting filly beats me. She must have been on the make, I reckon – my kind of girl.

It was great fun seeing him squirm when I told the story of how me and Chalky White walked in on him snogging his pillow in the dorms one evening (I could have told far worse, like when Jumbo Jenkins made him eat his underpants, but this didn’t seem the right time). Wonderful watching the little squirt sweat, though.

I ended up getting him beastly drunk and when nobody was about I deposited him face down in the punch-bowl with his trousers round his ankles and a banana placed strategically where only a doctor should examine. To round off an excellent evening I bulled his wife all over the storeroom and judging by the moans and wails she made, Weasel is no match for Flashy when it comes to bedsports.

Aye, Gentle Reader, I know what you're thinking right enough. But if it wasn’t for ogres like myself putting oiks like Weasel in their place, the lunatics would soon take over the asylum. Imagine a world run by people like John Kerry - it just doesn't bear thinking about.



FLASHMAN STRIKES AGAIN!



Paul Rodgers is not the best thing since fried Fred.
Josuè user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 27 May 04, 12:56 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

omg...


An interview? Oh, don't be ridiculous...
Penis - Vagina user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 27 May 04, 14:06 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

I'm interested in this topic, but your post is too long Flashman. Can someone summarize it for me? Is that how you spell summarize?

DrimmieNYC user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 27 May 04, 15:19 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Wow, you're a real man [sarcasm]

Sir Archie 'Tiffany' Leach user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 27 May 04, 16:16 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

I climb off my sick bed to take off my hat to you sir (although quite why I was wearing a hat in bed I'll never know).

Bumper sounds like a jolly wheeze too.


Nancy Astor : "If I were your wife I would put poison in your coffee".

Winston Churchill : "And if I were your husband I would drink it".
Daburcor? user not visiting Queenzone.com
Daburcor?
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Posted: 27 May 04, 16:39 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

"(although quite why I was wearing a hat in bed I'll never know)"

Hey, hats are good for all locations!


"Elton John and I became really good friends. I don't mean 'good friends' in that sense. I just mean we slept together." -Billy Joel
Sir Archie 'Tiffany' Leach user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 27 May 04, 16:41 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Underwater? In space?


Nancy Astor : "If I were your wife I would put poison in your coffee".

Winston Churchill : "And if I were your husband I would drink it".
Janet user not visiting Queenzone.com
Janet
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Posted: 27 May 04, 16:42 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

School Bully = compensation for very small penis.


-If you want the best seat in the house, you have to move the cat.





rhapsody__87 user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 27 May 04, 16:44 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Harsh, Flashie, way harsh.


...Erica*



"I don't judge others. I say if you feel good with what you're doing, let your freak flag fly."

--Sarah Jessica Parker
Sir Archie 'Tiffany' Leach user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 27 May 04, 16:45 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

My dear Janet what if the school bully is a girl?


Nancy Astor : "If I were your wife I would put poison in your coffee".

Winston Churchill : "And if I were your husband I would drink it".
Daburcor? user not visiting Queenzone.com
Daburcor?
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Posted: 27 May 04, 16:47 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Then it would be an EXTREMELY small penis.


"Elton John and I became really good friends. I don't mean 'good friends' in that sense. I just mean we slept together." -Billy Joel
Janet user not visiting Queenzone.com
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Posted: 27 May 04, 16:47 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Then she is called Flashman.


-If you want the best seat in the house, you have to move the cat.





Josuè user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 27 May 04, 17:01 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Dan you were awesome there.


An interview? Oh, don't be ridiculous...
Flashman user not visiting Queenzone.com
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Posted: 28 May 04, 02:43 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Drawing attention to my small penis is not only a cheapshot, but also a form of bullying in itself.

It's big enough to get me into trouble, and that's all that counts.

I've said too much...


FLASHMAN STRIKES AGAIN!



Paul Rodgers is not the best thing since fried Fred.
iGSM user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 28 May 04, 05:31 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

So long as it's not...the!

Yeah, you heard...the!


...this kettle is boiling over...

...one dump...one turd...two tits...John Deacon...

...one prawn...one shrimp...one clam...one chicken!
Flashman user not visiting Queenzone.com
Flashman
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Posted: 28 May 04, 12:18 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Pickled again, iGSM?


FLASHMAN STRIKES AGAIN!



Paul Rodgers is not the best thing since fried Fred.
Flashman user not visiting Queenzone.com
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Posted: 29 May 04, 03:04 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Incidentally iGSM - what happened to your old pal Lester Burnham? I ain't seen him in these parts for a while.

Maybe he's just changed his username without me realising it. Or has he quit after flirting with you for three months before realising you were a feller?

We've all been there Lester. You're a fine sort and the board misses you. If you haven't gone and are still here under a pseudonym then forgive my ignorance. But it was Dan's fault.


FLASHMAN STRIKES AGAIN!



Paul Rodgers is not the best thing since fried Fred.
Flashman user not visiting Queenzone.com
Flashman
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Posted: 30 May 04, 17:23 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Hmmm...

So are we to presume that poor ol' Lester is dead?

And I'm sure he owed me a fiver too.


FLASHMAN STRIKES AGAIN!



Paul Rodgers is not the best thing since fried Fred.
Penis - Vagina user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 30 May 04, 17:52 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

He replied to this thread on the 6th:

http://www.queenzone.com/queen/forum/topic_view.asp?Q_FORUM_ID=3&Q_FORUM_NAME=Personal&Q_FORUM_TOPIC_ID=348118&TOPIC_SUBJECT=Hi+everybody%2C+I%27m+not+new+here%2E%2E%2E

Let's give him a full month before presuming deathness.

Bob The Shrek user not visiting Queenzone.com
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Posted: 31 May 04, 03:49 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Shrek's don't get bullied - plus the fact I was 5'9" when I was 11 (I am only 5'10" now) so the chances of me being bullied were pretty remote.


Cleveland May 24 to June 4th 2007 - I came, I saw, I fucked off home again.