Someone I know wrote this:
John Kerry's love for his fellow man exceeds all bounds. Yesterday, he
invited John Edwards over to his hotel room. Lt. Kerry was dressed in
his dress navy blues, adorned with all his medals. Edwards appeared,
daintily attired in a a Catholic schoolgirl's uniform, with red plaid
skirt, white bobby socks, and shiny black patent leather shoes. He
skipped merrily along, with books cradled close to his heaving,
bountiful chest, and teasingly licking a large lollipop in his right
In Edward's enthusiasm, he dropped his books, and two of them
suffered bent pages, and mild smudging. Mr. Kerry was VERY angry, and
he declared, that Edwards was very NAUGHTY, and MUST be punished.
Edwards started to cry, and shake with fear at his transgression, and
the necessary punishment. Kerry, in somber and serious tones,
commanded that Edwards must be taken over the knee, and spanked fifty
times. Edwards cried, "No! Please....No, anything but that."
But Kerry insisted, and pulled the blushing Edwards over his lap,
as Kerry sat on a woooden chair. Kerry yanked Edwards' panties down to
his ankles, exposing the delicate skin of Edwards luscious derierre to
the fierce blows of Kerry's worn and grizzled palm.
Spank! Spank! The sound of Kerry's hand slapping off the soft,
white skin of Edwards plump backside. Spank! Edwards shrieked in pain,
but slowly began to enjoy the attention being shown to his body by the
forceful, older man Kerry.
When the required series of strokes had been inflicted on the
poor, abused young man, his sobs began to trail off, and Kerry began
to tenderly caress the soft skin beneath his hand, and Edwards began
to squirm with excitement on the older man's lap.
"Let's talk about the first thing that pops up!"
[Fade to black]
"Brian May, Freddie will."