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geeksandgeeks user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 11 Nov 04, 21:07 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

My friend Alyssa once told me this hilarious joke; I was laughing for about an hour afterwords and I think the director of our musical decided I was taking drugs. Unfortunately, I haven't seen her in a while, and I've completely forgotten the joke. Its distinguishing characteristics are that it takes about a half-hour to tell, it's X-rated, and it explains why Walter Mondale is nicknamed "Fritz." If any of you know this joke, I would greatly appreciate if you would put it in this topic. I really want it back.


God wants you to send me some money.



"Seven spades doubled, vulnerable, making seven? You BITCH."
Brian_Mays_Wig user not visiting Queenzone.com
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Posted: 12 Nov 04, 02:47 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman in a rape line-up. The victim walks into the courtroom and the Irishman shouts: "That's her, the miserable bitch!"

I know thats not the one but I found it funny!

Please note, I do not condone the above :oD


Chom own mudder fukker.
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Posted: 12 Nov 04, 03:15 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

lol, that is good...



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SergeantPepperDG user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 12 Nov 04, 18:19 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

...wha...?


Kay Adams Corleone- The ultimate desperate housewife
Sonia Doris user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 12 Nov 04, 18:20 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

is a "lol" necessary here? :P


2+2=5
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Posted: 12 Nov 04, 18:25 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

I'm not sure. I don't think so.


Kay Adams Corleone- The ultimate desperate housewife
geeksandgeeks user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 12 Nov 04, 18:26 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Holy hell, guys...



God wants you to send me some money.



"Seven spades doubled, vulnerable, making seven? You BITCH."
Flashman user not visiting Queenzone.com
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Posted: 12 Nov 04, 18:31 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Geeks, that joke you're on about probably wasn't even that funny.

Being a woman, you might have just been on the blob or something, and your hormones were probably all over the shop.


FLASHMAN STRIKES AGAIN!



Paul Rodgers is not the best thing since fried Fred.
MetzgerR user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 12 Nov 04, 18:33 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

I don't know why, but I always want to crack up when I hear the phrase 'holy hell'....Not that this has anything whatsoever to do with the topic, gomen!

Ja ne.

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Posted: 12 Nov 04, 18:33 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Okay, I've got a joke.

So, this guy (I'll call him "Guy A")walks into a diner, and sees that the special of the day is chile. "Guy A" asks the waitress for a bowl and she says, "Sorry, that man next to you just got the last bowl." So the "Guy A" who wants the chile looks over at the man who got the last bowl (I'll call him "Guy B"). "Guy B" isn't eating it, and he's just kinda stirring it around with his spoon and playing with it. "Guy A" politely asks "Guy B," "Say, are you going to eat that? Because I'd love a bowl but there's none left." "Guy B" says, "Oh sure," and he pushes the bowl over to "Guy A." "Guy A" starts eating it, and it's REALLY good. However, when he reaches the bottom of the bowl, he finds a big, dead rat at the bottom. EWWW!!! So, "Guy A" starts vomiting all the chile back up into the bowl, and "Guy B" looks at him and says, "Yeah, that's about as far as I got too."

Sorry if that was confusing. It sounds better outloud.


Kay Adams Corleone- The ultimate desperate housewife
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Posted: 12 Nov 04, 18:40 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Ooh! I've got another one!

Q: What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag?

A: One's plastic and dangerous to children, and the other one holds groceries.

Heh heh... that's a knee-slapper AND a toe-tapper (*ahem* inside joke).


Kay Adams Corleone- The ultimate desperate housewife
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Posted: 12 Nov 04, 19:33 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Sorry, HeM...I don't get your joke. What does a zipper have to do with eating a banana? I'm lost!

Ja ne!

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Posted: 12 Nov 04, 19:33 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Heres a cracker...

These three English guys are out drinking one night and decide that they want to have a fight. They stagger from pub to pub looking for a likely victim to pick on when they come across a single Irishman in this one bar.
"Watch this." Says the first Englishman, heading over toward the guy, "I here that St Patrick was a shirt lifter."
"Really." Says the Irishman, calmly continuing to drink.
With that the second English guy decides to join in, "Yeah, and here he was a pervert too."
"Is that so?" the still calm Irishman responds.
"I know how to rile this tosser." Says the third Englishman, staggering toward the Irishman, "Hey, did you know St Patrick was really an Englishman?"
The Irish guy casually looks up and says, "Yeah, so your mates were telling me."


I'm saying nothing.....
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Posted: 12 Nov 04, 19:47 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

I got one.

The Deaf Genie

A man named Richard walks in a bar and he sees a man (Mark) looking inside of a box. Richard wants to know whats in it so he looks in the box. Richard saw a 9 inch pianoist playing a 5 inch piano. "Wow!" Richard shouts. "Were did you get this little guy?"
Mark replys "I got him from a genie in the forest."
Richard wants to know more about this genie, so he goes to the forest.
After standing out there for about 5 minutes a genie appers. "I am a genie. You may have only one wish." says the genie.
Richard thinks about it for a while and then says, "I wish for a million bucks. I want to be rich."
The genie says, "Your wish is my command."
*Poof* a millions Ducks fall from the sky.
Richard is dissapointed with his wish from the genie and starts to yell and scream. "I didn't want ducks, I wanted bucks!"
So, after Richard yells and screams he goes back into the bar.
He tells Mark, "that genie is stupid. I wished for a million bucks and he gave me ducks."
Mark turns to Richard and says, "Do you think I wished for a 9 inch pianist?"


I don't swim in your toilet, so don't pee in my pool!

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Posted: 13 Nov 04, 08:51 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws?

Outlaws are wanted


Cleveland May 24 to June 4th 2007 - I came, I saw, I fucked off home again.
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Posted: 13 Nov 04, 18:00 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

got one a romanian translated (and adapted) joke:
the wolf is walking in the forest with a very serious face. he meets the (sexy) fox:
"Oh, hello handsome" said the fox, "h r ya?"
"I am holding my black list. I am killing everybody who's in the list"
"Am I in there?"
"Unfortunately, yes"
buf-bing-bam-boom (He kills her.)
Next he runs into the bear.
"Hey pal" said the bear. "h r ya doin?"
"I am holding my black list. I am killing everybody who's in the list"
"Am I in there?"
"Unfortunately, yes"
pif-paf-poof-yaaaaaaaaaaaa (He kills him.)
The third encounter is with the rabbit.
"Hey, Woolfie, dear! How are you these days?
"I am holding my black list. I am killing everybody who's in the list"
"Am I in there?"
"Unfortunately, yes"
"Can you NOT kill me?
"Of course!"
THE END



2+2=5
geeksandgeeks user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 14 Nov 04, 16:51 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Flashman wrote:

Geeks, that joke you're on about probably wasn't even that funny.

Being a woman, you might have just been on the blob or something, and your hormones were probably all over the shop.


It takes a lot to get me laughing like that, Flashy, dear.

In the meantime, here's one to ponder on?

Q: What's the difference between a porcupine and an SUV containing Scott Stapp, Zakk Wylde, and Axl Rose?

A: In the porcupine, the pricks are on the OUTSIDE.


God wants you to send me some money.



"Seven spades doubled, vulnerable, making seven? You BITCH."