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Mrs.Taylor user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 26 Nov 04, 08:03 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

GREAT TRUTHS THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED:

1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats.

2) When your Mom is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair.

3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person.

4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.

5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food.

6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.

7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time.

8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.

9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.

10) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandpa's lap.



GREAT TRUTHS THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED:


1) Raising teenagers is like nailing Jell-O to a tree.

2) Wrinkles don't hurt.

3) Families are like fudge...mostly sweet, with a few nuts.

4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.

5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.

6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy.


GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD



1) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.

2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.

3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there.

4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.

5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.

6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.

7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.

THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:


1) You believe in Santa Claus.

2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.

3) You are Santa Claus.

4) You look like Santa Claus.


SUCCESS:


At age 4 success is . . . not peeing in your pants.

At age 12 success is . . . having friends.

At age 16 success is . . . having a drivers license.

At age 20 success is . . having a girlfriend that thinks you a really good looking

At age 35 success is . . . having money.

At age 50 success is . . . having money.

At age 60 success is . . having a girlfriend that thinks you are really good looking

At age 70 success is . . . having a drivers license.

At age 75 success is . . . having friends.

At age 80 success is . . . not peeing in your pants.



Yes, it's me. I'm back.



I haven't lost my mind, it's backed up on a disk somewhere
Yogurt user not visiting Queenzone.com
Yogurt
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Posted: 26 Nov 04, 10:27 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Haha
Thats was really cool to read.


I don't swim in your toilet, so don't pee in my pool!

LiveAidQueen user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 26 Nov 04, 16:49 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

It's like she knows everything about life. :-)


Comprende muchacho.
KillerQueen840 user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 26 Nov 04, 16:51 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Ah, that was very creative!


"The walls we build around us to keep sadness out also keep out the joy."

(Jim Rohn)
kaede user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 26 Nov 04, 18:31 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

***gigggggle********


Happy Holidays
Mayboy user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 27 Nov 04, 08:54 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

hehe so true :D


"I'm going up Buchanan Street

With a box of fireworks

And two bottles of

Tizer"

LiveAidQueen user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 27 Nov 04, 09:48 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

The success one is great. :-)


Comprende muchacho.