Forums > Personal > Employee Training (Adult Humor)

forum rss feed
Author

Mahler user not visiting Queenzone.com

Rocker: 43 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 23 May 05, 14:18 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

...from Don of MPPC of yahooogroups.com


In order to assure the highest levels of quality work and productivity from employees, it will be our policy to keep all employees well trained through our program of Special High Intensity Training (S.H.I.T). We are trying to give employees more S.H.I.T than anyone else.

If you feel that you do not receive your share of S.H.I.T on the job, please see your manager. You will be immediately placed at the top of the S.H.I.T list, and our managers are especially skilled at seeing that you get all the S.H.I.T you can handle.

Employees who do not take their S.H.I.T will be placed in Departmental Employee Evaluation Programs (D.E.E.P S.H.I.T) Those who fail to take D.E.E.P S.H.I.T seriously will have to go to Employee Attitude Training (E.A.T S.H.I.T).

Since our managers took S.H.I.T before they were promoted, they do not have to do S.H.I.T anymore, as they are all full of S.H.I.T already.

If you are full of S.H.I.T, you may be interested in a job training others. We can add your name to our Basic Understanding Lecture List (B.U.L.L S.H.I.T) Those who are full of B.U.L.L S.H.I.T will get the S.H.I.T jobs, and can apply for promotion to Director of Intensity Programming (D.I.P S.H.I.T)

If you have further questions, please direct them to our Head Of Training, Special High Intensity Training (H.O.T S.H.I.T)

Thank you,

Boss in General
(B.I.G S.H.I.T)

bitesthedust user not visiting Queenzone.com

Deity: 3242 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 23 May 05, 14:23 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

oh good, you're back !!

_amadeus_ user not visiting Queenzone.com

Bohemian: 763 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 23 May 05, 15:15 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

You have too much time on your hands.


Nobody is always a winner, and anybody who says he is, is either a liar or doesn't play poker.
KillerQueen840 user not visiting Queenzone.com

Deity: 4081 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 23 May 05, 15:16 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

_amadeus_ wrote:

You have too much time on your hands.



Awe, thanks a lot. Now I got that song stuck in my head.


"The walls we build around us to keep sadness out also keep out the joy."

(Jim Rohn)
bitesthedust user not visiting Queenzone.com

Deity: 3242 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 23 May 05, 15:23 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

which song's that?

KillerQueen840 user not visiting Queenzone.com

Deity: 4081 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 23 May 05, 15:24 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

"Too Much Time on My Hands."-Styx


"The walls we build around us to keep sadness out also keep out the joy."

(Jim Rohn)
Daburcor? user not visiting Queenzone.com
Daburcor?
Deity: 9478 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 23 May 05, 15:35 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

<font color="lime">KillerQueen840 wrote:

_amadeus_ wrote:

You have too much time on your hands.



Awe, thanks a lot. Now I got that song stuck in my head.
Me too... "T-t-t-too much time on my hands..."


"Elton John and I became really good friends. I don't mean 'good friends' in that sense. I just mean we slept together." -Billy Joel
Mahler user not visiting Queenzone.com

Rocker: 43 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 24 May 05, 02:11 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

I've just been promoted to Special High Intensity Training Honorary
Employee Assistance Director




---------The above is from somebody, somewhere and well, I am not tellin ya where. But if that is any indication as to who just got a new job recently..


If ya watched the last few minutes of 24 last night, you'd have seen this bald guy with a dark mustache come from around a door entranceway, just the side of his face, complete with glasses.

Now, understand this, I know someone who looks like that.

And he ah, well, was a protege' to a deputy director to the Central Intelligence Agency, Ray S. Cline, under President Kennedy 1960's.

There was a notice out there the new CIA chief was looking to fill a few job position so whether the honorary assistant position as noted way above is any indication as to what's up new and soon or not, only time will tell, otherwise, speculation.


WK