Forums > Personal > Help! Get me a nurse!

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Flashman user not visiting Queenzone.com
Flashman
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Posted: 24 May 05, 14:54 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

... dressed in the 60s style, if possible. Err... 1960s, you blasted wiseacre.

I feel a bit peaky and need a tender hand.

My symptons (and I ain't been drinking):- General nausea. Dizzy spells. Headache. Temperature high. Needed to unbutton shirt, revealing muscular torso.

Something violent is about to erupt at one end or t'other. When it happens I will provide an in-depth description.

May be down to dodgy Chicken Tikka sandwich I had at lunchtime.

All diagnoses welcome. Hope it ain't the plague. If I'm a goner, I'm taking you all with me.

My heart I leave to medical science. Good luck trying to find it.

Poor ol' Flashy.


FLASHMAN STRIKES AGAIN!



Paul Rodgers is not the best thing since fried Fred.
Queenleaf user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 24 May 05, 15:07 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

I may not be a nurse but I'm a good cure for what ails ya! :P


Madam, you have between your legs an instrument capable of giving pleasure to thousands and all you can do is scratch it.

-Sir Thomas Beecham to a lady cellist
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Posted: 24 May 05, 15:08 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

And I'm usually dressed in the 60s style... so


Madam, you have between your legs an instrument capable of giving pleasure to thousands and all you can do is scratch it.

-Sir Thomas Beecham to a lady cellist
Flashman user not visiting Queenzone.com
Flashman
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Posted: 24 May 05, 15:57 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Thanks Queenleaf, you're a real tonic.

I was going to paint you all a vivid picture describing the technicolour motion I expected to pass (tawny browns, sunset yellow and, God forbid, pea greens), but try as I might - nothing doing. Gave myself cramps.

But there's definitely something evil brewing - I ain't far from DEFCON 1, but I doubt there'll be enough notice to serve a four minute warning - so take my advice and stand near something heavy, just in case.

Curses! If I'm no better tomorrow I'll have to go and see the damn Sawbones. Useless quack is so old he's probably still practising leechcraft.

I'll go and see if a drop of brandy will shift it - it's life's great elixir, after all.



FLASHMAN STRIKES AGAIN!



Paul Rodgers is not the best thing since fried Fred.
Sonia Doris user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 24 May 05, 16:10 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

*puts on her nurse outfit*
can i help?


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Smitty user not visiting Queenzone.com
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Smitty
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Posted: 24 May 05, 19:07 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Flashman I've searched through all of the tabloids I could find and I've found your answer... you are infected with
IcneyopterixiactopolislessinthetrouserpocketoftaylorgagawaitaminuteihavetopullouttheexplosivesstrappedtojohnlydonandBAMiosis

You are obviously turning into either a reptile, an elephant, or you are turning into a leading medical professional with the smarts to cure taylorgaga's, or john lydon's obvious ailment that each are turning into a bunch of vegans (no clue on how to spell that)in a hunt camp (no offence pointed toward vegans or hunters) but you don't have the smarts to save yourself or to keep John Lydon or Taylorgaga from meeting on the street and tearing eachother's heads off. When that time comes, I will be selling tickets to see the head-ripping of the century. Want to place any bets? Anyway flashman, any questions about your ailment?

(tickets go on sale as soon as I can find a crayon)

doremi user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 24 May 05, 20:24 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Take 2 aspirin and call me in the morning.

Oh..and we can send you a nurse..the kind that REALLY takes care of ALL of your needs...she plays nurse and you can play either a patient...or a Doctor and tell her she's been really bad..or really good.

You WILL get my bill. :)


xyz
Flashman user not visiting Queenzone.com
Flashman
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Posted: 25 May 05, 02:48 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Head... swimming.....
Can't... open... eyes.....
Must... make... toilet in time....
D'oh!
Wasn't me.... Bigger boy.

Woe is me! Feel much the same this morning. Might go and take a few pot-shots at passing grannies, see if it cheers me up a bit.

I've been told that 'there's a bug going around'. Can't give you any pointers, but hopefully you'll know it when you see it.

Kick it up the arse for Flashy.


FLASHMAN STRIKES AGAIN!



Paul Rodgers is not the best thing since fried Fred.
Queenleaf user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 27 May 05, 13:22 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

lol@the hero

Are ya better Flashy?


Madam, you have between your legs an instrument capable of giving pleasure to thousands and all you can do is scratch it.

-Sir Thomas Beecham to a lady cellist
Sonia Doris user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 27 May 05, 17:09 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

so, u need me? or should i change in my fbi agent outfit?


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doremi user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 27 May 05, 17:12 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Yeah how ya be these days! :)


xyz
Sonia Doris user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 27 May 05, 17:13 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

me?


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Flashman user not visiting Queenzone.com
Flashman
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Posted: 28 May 05, 05:16 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

JohnMercury wrote:

Nope, i think she means whoever started this thread!!


The name's Flashman, my lad. Now get down on your fucking knees and apologise.

Aye, I'm back - hale, hearty, large as life and twice as handsome.

And what's more, I'll be turning this fucking site on its head - weeding out all the little shysters, worms and guttersnipes that have clogged this once proud site for too long, and dragged its grand reputation into the mire.

By my hand only can these boards be transformed, and forged once more into the great bastion that has now passed into myth and legend. Once more shall it be returned to its former glory. Once more shall people come from far and wide to marvel and worship. Once more shall the name of QueenZone be restored to its rightful place at the very pinnacle of fan driven Internet notice boards.

Oh, I just can't be arsed.


FLASHMAN STRIKES AGAIN!



Paul Rodgers is not the best thing since fried Fred.
Sonia Doris user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 28 May 05, 08:16 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

*takes off her nurse outfit*
oops...



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Sonia Doris user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 28 May 05, 08:18 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

oh my...


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Sonia Doris user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 28 May 05, 08:29 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

<font color =#CC00FF>***Marial-B*** wrote:

Sonia... just Martijn is authorized to see you naked, remember that

oh... who said i was naked?


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Sonia Doris user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 28 May 05, 08:55 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

<font color =#CC00FF>***Marial-B*** wrote:

<font color=#CC0066>Sonia Doris</font> wrote:

<font color =#CC00FF>***Marial-B*** wrote:

Sonia... just Martijn is authorized to see you naked, remember that

oh... who said i was naked?


Yourself

oh my...


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iGSM user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 28 May 05, 09:39 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Flashman, you old tart. Bed rest and a sniff of port will sort it out. Unless it's cirrohsis.


...this kettle is boiling over...

...one dump...one turd...two tits...John Deacon...

...one prawn...one shrimp...one clam...one chicken!
Sir Archie 'Tiffany' Leach user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 28 May 05, 13:03 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Probably the clap.


Nancy Astor : "If I were your wife I would put poison in your coffee".

Winston Churchill : "And if I were your husband I would drink it".
Sir Archie 'Tiffany' Leach user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 28 May 05, 13:06 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Probably the clap.


Nancy Astor : "If I were your wife I would put poison in your coffee".

Winston Churchill : "And if I were your husband I would drink it".