Forums > Personal > To assume is to make an ass of u and me

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FreeSpirit328 user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 07 Feb 06, 21:16 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

I hate it when people make assumptions about me without asking any questions.

Before I say anything else, I'm not talking about anyone here; just people in general.

Recently my "supposed" best friend informed me that her husband said he could never have a relationship or marry someone like me because I'd be too much work. I mean, I don't want her husband or anything, but he based that opinion on assumption alone.

He wasn't referring to my blindness; that would make him a total hipacrit because his wife is blind. He was referring to my other disability which is that I'm unable to walk without something to help me keep my balance.

People just assume that because I or anyone else in a similar situation can't walk, we must be paralyzed. It makes me want to post a bulletin on my forehead saying, "My brain forgot how to keep balance, it didn't forget how to move."

Anyway, I know this sounds like a whining session...I guess my point is that I wish people wouldn't make assumptions that they know nothing about unless they ask.




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Music Man user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 08 Feb 06, 03:47 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

As to not make any assumptions, I suppose the best method would be to ask you directly. How does a blind person go about participating on a notice board?


Creativity can always cover for a lack of knowledge.
FreeSpirit328 user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 08 Feb 06, 05:29 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

I use a screen reader called jaws. It reads everything on the screen to me...well except for graphics.

As a reference

www.freedomscientific.com

My computer is my life. I don't know what I would do without it.


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Fairy user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 08 Feb 06, 06:23 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Hi FreeSpirit!
It's strange...your friend's husband thinks that being unable to walk is the worst disability. There was a poll on QZ last year and most people said that blindness would be the absolute worst....Which seemed so weird to me because I'm blind and I can do just about anything except driving (which pisses me off but there are far worse things around). I hate being blind, but I would never trade it for any other disability...

About your friend's husband, just ignore it. He feels being with someone who can't walk properly is a drag, but he did marry a blind girl. Others may marry someone in a wheelchair, but would never date a blind person. Others would never care for disability, but would never date someone of another race, religion, background, level of education, etc. It's sad, but we can't really blame them, as we all have our likes and dislikes. Sure it can make us sad to know someone would not date us because of our disability. But I'm not a saint myself, as I've rejected guys too, for reasons which maybe other girls would not find important (like level of education, for example).

I too get hurt about these things sometimes. I'm very cautious and I feel awkward when I go on dates, because I have this thought on my mind that the guy is only seeing my disability. But through the years I've discovered that it was often me, and not my date, who kept thinking about my disability all the time....The way we see ourselves has a big impact on how others perceive us.

Or maybe your friend's husband doesn't deserve all this analyzing...Maybe he's simply a jerk! Whatever, just leave him alone and look ahead. There's someone for everyone (though I still haven't found him....but not because of my disability) LOL.

Love

Fairy

Ps. Sorry guys for the long post but I'm at work and bored...can you tell?



“If the house crumbles... I’ll just build it again”

King Freddie



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Fairy user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 08 Feb 06, 06:26 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Ps. Your best friend was an asshole for telling you that. It didn't do any good to anyone


“If the house crumbles... I’ll just build it again”

King Freddie



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FreeSpirit328 user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 08 Feb 06, 09:20 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Fairy wrote:

Ps. Your best friend was an asshole for telling you that. It didn't do any good to anyone


Yeah I know....we don't really talk much anymore. She likes to rub my face in the fact that she's married.

Thanks for the post though. I've had a few experiences with guys...obviously not positive ones. Oh and forget a date...I've never been onone, lol

I'll say this though, when you start fantasizing about having a relationship with a dead rock star, it's time to find a living person to have that relationship with, lol


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Haystacks Calhoun user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 08 Feb 06, 13:50 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Will it read this???


"Shut your fucking face, Uncle Fucker..."

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha


"Not a fan of the ladies, are you Trebek?"



Sean Connery
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Posted: 08 Feb 06, 15:24 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Barry © wrote:

"Yeah I know....we don't really talk much anymore. She likes to rub my face in the fact that she's married."

Frankly speaking, by the sound of it she is welcome to her husband. Looking after someone you love is work? I live with a disabled person and what I do for them I don't class as work. Someday you're going to find a nice boyfriend who will not look at you as work.


Wonderful post, Barry. I totally agree with you.


“If the house crumbles... I’ll just build it again”

King Freddie



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Fairy user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 08 Feb 06, 15:26 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Haystacks Calhoun wrote:

Will it read this???


"Shut your fucking face, Uncle Fucker..."

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha


Unfortunately, it does read it. They still have to invent a screen reader that blocks out stupid posts...

LOL LOL LOL!!!


“If the house crumbles... I’ll just build it again”

King Freddie



http://miracleblog.queenzone.com/
FreeSpirit328 user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 08 Feb 06, 16:04 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Barry © wrote:

"Yeah I know....we don't really talk much anymore. She likes to rub my face in the fact that she's married."

Frankly speaking, by the sound of it she is welcome to her husband. Looking after someone you love is work? I live with a disabled person and what I do for them I don't class as work. Someday you're going to find a nice boyfriend who will not look at you as work.


Thanks Barry, yes, someday I will find someone who will want to be with me...not think of me as nussence or something.

I can't wait for Tuesday because I'm finally going to get the chance to tell my counselor about this. I've had to wait a whole month...she thinks it's time to close my case....lol, she's funny.


www.youravon.com/jaberdeen



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