THE FAIRY FELLER - STORY 1
A bright, young fairy man walked down the noisy street of a large village. He walked quietly, his hands in his pockets, looking down at the ground. Slung over his left shoulder was an axe -- Medium-sized, sharp and shining in the cold air. He ignored the stares and awed voices put at him, instead repeating the task appointed upon him by the fairy queen, Titania.
You see, the fairy feller was quite famous in this village; actually he was known all around for his amazing lumber work, and for creating beautifully ornate woodworks with his slender hands; he also fixed many things, from kitchen utensils...To well, anything!
Anyway, the task he was assigned to was fairly simple -- To crack a very large hazelnut in half to build a new carriage for Princess Mab, Queen Titania's daughter. He was making his way to the woods, but the throngs of people around him made it difficult. He became somewhat tired and decided to rest at a tavern, to get a drink and chat with some fairy folk for a bit.
"No worries," he thought. "I will get to the woods by night's noon time."
Just as he was about to enter the tavern, a very large, rotund man came bounding towards him.
"Oh, mister feller!" the man said loudly, hopping closer to him. "Mister feller!"
"Oh dear," murmured the feller. It was the obnoxious ostler. He was always bothering him. "What do you want, you fat bucket of -- Oh, hello, mister ostler!" said the feller much too happily.
"Helloooo!" said the ostler, flashing him an overly friendly, almost leering smile. The feller shuddered. "How are you this afternoon?"
"Er, fine, just about to get a drink," answered the feller, more pain sinking into him now. Great, he would now have to have a drink with the fat bloke. "Er...Care to join me, sir?"
"Oh, yes, yes yes, anything with the great, wonderful fairy feller!" cried the ostler, lifting his sausage-like arms into the air.
The feller grimaced and opened the door, letting the ostler in first.
"Try not to kill me now..." thought the feller, as the ostler squeezed in. The feller looked down and noticed something odd about the ostler. Ah, he wasn't wearing any shoes! Why on earth was he not wearing any shoes?
The ostler ordered two pints of ale to be brought, and they sat down on the overstuffed armchairs near the fireplace. Everyone in the tavern hushed and stared as the ostler plopped down, and the feller delicately placed himself into the chair.
"The fairy feller!" someone cried.
"Mister feller, hello!"
The feller turned around and smiled at the fairy folk. He waved to them. They stared stupidly at him and waved back. He laughed and turned to the ostler, who was staring at him adoringly.
"Erm, so, mister ostler," said the feller. "How are your horses?"
"Oh, very fine, very fine!" replied the ostler, rubbing his round middle. "You should come by and see them. My finest horse, Chestnut, yes, is growing very finely. I think he would like you."
"Oh, that's very nice," said the feller, turning to take his pint from the tavern man. "Thank you." He placed a large, silver coin on the tray.
The ostler took his and placed a very small coin on the tray. The ostler wasn't very rich.
"Mister ostler," said the feller, putting his cup down on the table. "May I ask where your shoes went?"
"Oh!" said the ostler, spilling some of his ale. "My only pair...I had to get them fixed today. They're finished, and I still have to pay. I almost got to paying the tailor, but I...Er, ran short." He looked down at his bare feet.
The feller sighed. "Do you need me to help you?"
"That would be nice."
"How do your shoes keep to fit you? Don't your feet grow?"
"Well," said the ostler, shuffling his feet
I'm so pissed I could spit.