Forums > Personal > 12 things for a man to do in a department store

forum rss feed
Author

Drummer imense! user not visiting Queenzone.com
Drummer imense!
Bohemian: 267 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 15 Apr 06, 17:28 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Ok perhaps not quite as good as the police officer ones and the elevator ones, but well see what ya think! Personaly i like number 9.

12 things for a man to do in a department store – whilst his wife is shopping!

01. Get 24 boxes of condoms & randomly put them in people's trolleys
when they aren't looking.

02. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5 minute
intervals.

03. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone: 'Code 3
in Housewares... and see what happens.

04. Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on credit.

05. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

06. Set-up a tent in the Camping Department? and tell other shoppers you are sleeping over and invite them in if they bring pillows from the
Bedding Department.

07. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask: "Why
can't you people just leave me alone?"

08. Look right into the security camera, use it as a mirror and pick
your nose.

09. While handling large knives in the Kitchen Dept, ask the clerk if he
knows where the anti-depressants are located.

10. Dart around the store suspiciously, while loudly humming the theme
from Mission Impossible.

11. Hide in a clothing rack . . . and when people browse through, say:
"PICK ME!!! PICK ME!!!"

12. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, hit the floor and
assume the fetal position and scream "NO!...It's those voices again!!!"




I'm not a river or a giant bird, that soars to the sea, an if i'm never tied to anything i'll never be free!
Carol! the Musical user not visiting Queenzone.com
Carol! the Musical
Deity: 5934 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 15 Apr 06, 17:33 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Drummer imense! wrote:


11. Hide in a clothing rack . . . and when people browse through, say:
"PICK ME!!! PICK ME!!!"

!!!"



Lolllll


-Things Have Changed For Me-
Maruga user not visiting Queenzone.com
Maruga
Royalty: 1705 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 15 Apr 06, 17:40 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

hahaha quite funny.


Life Is A Bitch...

.aymz. 30947 user not visiting Queenzone.com

Champion: 64 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 16 Apr 06, 13:23 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

lol lovin number 10


I Love Queen!!!!!!
Poo, again user not visiting Queenzone.com
Poo, again
Deity: 4776 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 16 Apr 06, 13:26 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Yes, they're all quite funny...


[QUOTE][QUOTENAME]Jake? wrote: I want him to shove it down my throat and shoot. Shoot! Shoot! C'mon! SHOOT! SHOOT!

[/QUOTENAME]



[/QUOTE]







Sergei. user not visiting Queenzone.com
Impresario, still
Sergei.
Deity: 4682 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 16 Apr 06, 19:30 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

I have three for a man to do:
1)Put pantyhose on your arm and tell the clerk you don't think this fits quite right.
2)Pick up a gigantic plus sized bra and tell the salesperson, "Big boned gals turn me on."
3)Ask random customers what they bought and, "Can I see it?"


Back whenever
All I Hear Is Radio Gaga user not visiting Queenzone.com

Royalty: 1181 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 17 Apr 06, 02:02 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

LOL!! You know whats fun to do in a store that has large toy aisles? Get a football and throw it down the ailes or over the shelves...

or you get a big group of people and you play marco-polo...done that before...boy was that funny

Cheers


"Take The First Step In Faith, You Don't Have To See The Whole Staircase, Just Take The First Step."
Sergei. user not visiting Queenzone.com
Impresario, still
Sergei.
Deity: 4682 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 17 Apr 06, 07:33 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

LOL I was with my parents in this contemporary store and was looking at these leather boots, and this gay man at the counter was talking to a customer about that I was only wearing a Queen shirt to offend him...so I loosened the latch on this jewelry shelf and everything went sliding onto the floor...that was this past saturday. *ahem*


Back whenever
user name user not visiting Queenzone.com

Royalty: 1449 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 17 Apr 06, 07:35 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

TheFairyFeller'sFreakyFan wrote:

LOL I was with my parents in this contemporary store and was looking at these leather boots, and this gay man at the counter was talking to a customer about that I was only wearing a Queen shirt to offend him...so I loosened the latch on this jewelry shelf and everything went sliding onto the floor...that was this past saturday. *ahem*


Aw, that's mean.


Creativity can always cover for a lack of knowledge.
Sergei. user not visiting Queenzone.com
Impresario, still
Sergei.
Deity: 4682 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 17 Apr 06, 07:43 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Lol I know but I was mad cause that fool is there every time I go and he's always giving me the evil eye, and the only thing I've ever said to him was, "Hey, when does this place close?"


Back whenever
user name user not visiting Queenzone.com

Royalty: 1449 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 17 Apr 06, 07:45 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

You should have lifted some jewelry.


Creativity can always cover for a lack of knowledge.
Poo, again user not visiting Queenzone.com
Poo, again
Deity: 4776 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 17 Apr 06, 07:48 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

You should have gone home and eaten eggs instead.


[QUOTE][QUOTENAME]Jake? wrote: I want him to shove it down my throat and shoot. Shoot! Shoot! C'mon! SHOOT! SHOOT!

[/QUOTENAME]



[/QUOTE]







user name user not visiting Queenzone.com

Royalty: 1449 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 17 Apr 06, 07:59 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

The Millionaire Waltz wrote:

You should have gone home and eaten eggs instead.


Hmmm...you seem to have a fascination with eggs.


Creativity can always cover for a lack of knowledge.
Poo, again user not visiting Queenzone.com
Poo, again
Deity: 4776 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 17 Apr 06, 10:01 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Musicman wrote:

The Millionaire Waltz wrote:

You should have gone home and eaten eggs instead.


Hmmm...you seem to have a fascination with eggs.


Don't forget Fred Astaire... yummy.


[QUOTE][QUOTENAME]Jake? wrote: I want him to shove it down my throat and shoot. Shoot! Shoot! C'mon! SHOOT! SHOOT!

[/QUOTENAME]



[/QUOTE]







Munchsack user not visiting Queenzone.com

Royalty: 1770 posts
add to buddy list send PM

Posted: 17 Apr 06, 10:20 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote


Hey! People remember my elevator ones!

Quite often in shops I try to look suspicious, it's a right laugh. In IKEA I do loads of mad things like pick everything up and try and fit my head into it and jumping about on the carpets and stuff. Ho ho, I love IKEA.


This can't end well.